What "to" & "not to" say to an autistic mom.

To All regular people, Please be a little kind. Being Kind is COOL and It costs nothing!

What Not to

1. He looks so normal!
Is it, what did you expect?
why on earth anyone in their right mind would say their kid is autistic when the kid is not.

2. Maybe if you discipline your kid enough, he won't act like it.
The wiring in autistic kid's brains is different. If I spank my child he won't connect his behavior with the discipline tactics used. He will only think Mommy hurt me.
We go through hours of OT and Behavioural therapy sessions, it takes time, like months and years.. and still in progress.

3. My child has meltdowns too, it's all part of childhood.
OMG, Temper tantrums are normal yes we agree, Meltdowns are COMPLETELY different, I assure you. I know the difference.

4. God only gives special kids to special parents.
Please no, We are ordinary people just like you.
Any parent would do anything for a kid in need. You would too.

5. Autistic kids will be geniuses.
Yes and No, Just like typical kids atypical kids some are brilliant and some are not. 

6. Why are u bringing autistic kids to public places, it's a nuisance.
Just like you and anyone else, they deserve a normal life. Please be inclusive.

7. I am so sorry!

Dealing with kids with autism spectrum disorder is a daily challenge, however, we are not to be pitied.

Instead what you can say or do.. Only if you mean it

I am here if you need to talk or vent.

If you ever needed a break, I would be happy to babysit.

I know we have not seen in a while but that's ok.

Can we schedule a play date?

I don't know what you are going through, but I admire your strength

We would love for your kid to come with and we will work with their needs.

Celebrate small wins with us.

I bought Pizza/Briyani, Let's just hang out at your place. Also, don't bother cleaning your place.

Teach your kids to be inclusive and kind.

I am grateful for all the people who are considerate and compassionate.

I have a supportive family, and friends who check on me no matter what, not everyone is fortunate enough to have good people around. Let us be kind, especially for people who are already struggling. Let's make the world a better place for the sake of our kids.